Monday, September 21, 2020.
On this date, I was caught up in several duties and could not perform the invocation until quite late, around 2 a.m. or so. As my opportunity drew nearer, the spirit of Azazel surrounded me heavily. As I walked, it weighed me down, oppressive, not menacing, but urgent. So urgent. As I prepared the ritual and entered it, the Behemoth song "Alas, Lord is upon me" came to my mind, as Lord Azazel was truly upon me, crushing me down, giving me the classic "lump in my throat" feeling. As I spoke the words of the ritual, the feeling dissipated, leaving me with a feeling of vertigo as I crossed the veil.
(I must warn you now- this was the darkest and saddest of all our interactions thus far. I was, am, so conflicted about this message that it has obviously taken me a few weeks to post it here.)
I have come to tell you of several things. Listen and you will know.
The end of days is near.
You will be spared the misery and pain but many others will perish.
You have been called to perform duties for the Master; these duties will require great sacrifice.
Do not be afraid, and do not falter in the performance of these duties.
Can you tell me what these duties will be, Lord Azazel?
You will know them when you are called to them.
Will the duties affect my family, my loved ones?
They may affect your family. At that time, however, this will not be a great issue. You will see.
(At this statement, my mind began to spin into conjecture, but I controlled myself and asked:) Will my loved ones die, then?
(Throughout, Lord Azazel spoke in a measured, matter-of-fact tone. It may seem, from the terseness of his statements, that he was saying these things in an off-hand manner, but I assure you it did not present like that at all. He took a few seconds before replying.)
Perhaps. Many will be dead. You will understand sooner than most.
Your role is Warrior/Priest, Warrior/Magician. The Gods are always with you; they will guide and comfort you. Do not be sad, hearken to the voice within you.
(I sat for a while in contemplation, listening to the voice within me. Then I spoke the words out loud.)
I accept.
Good. You really haven't any choice, (here he laughed, a short, loud sound).
Can you offer me any comfort?
Yes. You will find happiness. Your lineage will live on, in tales of greatness.
Lord Azazel, in all honesty, the things you are saying frighten me a little.
Of course they frighten you. Who would not be afraid, faced with such a prospect? You must persevere, hang on, be strong to the end of the hard times. You are my ward, and I will keep you and lift you up.
Lord Azazel, the last time we spoke, I meant to ask you for dietary advice, to supplement my training.
Stay away from legumes. Stay away from pork; less of beef, more of fowl. Do not stuff yourself. Drink water, drink wine. Breads are fine, but not sugary ones.
Maintain your fitness.
Are there any other exercises you recommend?
Pull yourself up. Do this as well as you can. Your running is better, keep it up.
Is hiking (an area near me) a good thing as well?
Hike no more than three times a week, but run every day. Move forward with your running and exercising, do not neglect meditation, no not neglect prayer and ritual.
Be a magician. Keep your practices.
Do not forget that you are a warrior.
Notes:
This invocation left me with a feeling of deep sadness. I wish I could come up with some comforting words, but I really can't find any. However, I will say this.
On my desk, I keep a fossil of a trilobite, Order Phacopida, suborder Calyminina. This particular little (9 cm) guy crawled around the oceans of a world which, when he was alive about 450 million years ago, looked completely different than the Earth we live on today. None of the continents that we live on existed; in fact, much of the land we walk on today was underwater then.
This weird little alien guy, who looks like a cross between a shrimp and a pillbug, did share one thing in common with human beings at that time. Life. He lived, and walked, and ate, and mated, and eventually perished as all living things eventually do. He, and all of his cousins and distant relatives no longer exist on this planet in any form. The last of the species went extinct over 250 million years ago.
As I hold the little guy in my hand, I can see that some of his little back plates are ruffled up. I wonder if this happened post-mortem, as he rolled along the in the currents of some primordial sea, or if this was something that trilobites could do, as some sort of ritual of aggression or reproduction. I will never know, however, because in the natural order of things, they passed from existence millions of years ago, and no one will ever see one of them alive.
All to say, this little guy puts the possibility of a truncated timeline of human existence into sharp perspective. This is not to say that I want humanity to end, absolutely not. I want humanity to survive, and thrive, and continue to evolve to the very pinnacle that nature and existence can endure.
However, I will not deceive myself into believing that the age of Men can continue into Eternity.
...On another note- legumes?
Thank you for reading thus far, and may your day be a pleasant one.
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| My little extinct buddy. |
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